As a surrogate mom, you’re taking care of a child for 9 months—a life-changing accountability that ties you to the supposed dad and mom (IPs) in an extremely intimate and highly effective means.
Given this extraordinary circumstance, it’s comprehensible that many surrogates wish to have a powerful reference to the dad and mom.
Whereas there’s no such factor as a “excellent” supposed guardian, relaxation assured there is an excellent match for you. (And keep in mind that once you’re able to develop into a surrogate, SPS will make it easier to each step of the way in which, together with the matching course of.)
However how will you realize that the IPs are the very best match?
Right here is how SPS approaches the matching course of, and 5 vital issues to search for in an supposed guardian.
The matching course of at SPS
When matching surrogates and IPs, some surrogacy businesses give supposed dad and mom a database of potential surrogates to scroll by way of. However for us, surrogates are excess of a reputation on a display.
Our objective is to create a bond and belief between surrogates and IPs to make the expertise of each events as rewarding as doable.
We imagine that the matching course of must be approached with private care and intensive expertise. Our founder and president, Cristie Montgomery, personally guides the matching course of, which is among the fundamental causes we’ve got had such an extended historical past of success.
(Learn a step-by-step information to our matching course of right here.)
What to search for in an supposed guardian
1. They need the identical type of relationship throughout the journey and after supply
With regards to the connection between surrogates and IPs, it’s vital that you simply’re on the identical web page.
Would you like a detailed relationship with the IPs throughout your journey? How usually do you wish to speak to them, and the way would you want to speak? Would you just like the IPs to accompany you to physician’s appointments?
What sort of relationship would you want after you give delivery? Would you like it to finish or would you want updates in regards to the youngster?
These are simply a number of the questions you’ll handle once you fill out your profile initially of your journey and at your match assembly.
2. You agree on what number of embryos to switch
After going by way of IVF, most IPs have multiple embryo obtainable to switch. Often, one embryo is transferred, however once in a while, a physician will advocate transferring two to extend the probabilities of a profitable being pregnant.
If multiple embryo is transferred, the surrogate might find yourself carrying multiples. So, it’s vital that you simply agree on what number of embryos to switch at one time.
3. You share the identical views on selective discount and termination
Most supposed dad and mom in our program have had problem in conceiving and skilled loss. Because of this, it’s comprehensible that they need as wholesome a baby as doable.
Whereas termination shouldn’t be frequent, it’s vital that you simply and the supposed dad and mom share related beliefs on this challenge.
These are, in fact, tough matters to debate, however we are going to assist facilitate these conversations to make sure that everyone seems to be in settlement and feels as snug as doable.
4. They meet your expectations when it comes to character, life-style, values, and so forth.
Earlier than you’re matched, it’s a good suggestion to create an inventory of traits you’d just like the IPs to have.
For instance, does marital standing matter to you? Does it matter the place they stay? Do you wish to work with somebody who already has children? What about sexual orientation and faith? Household construction and degree of help? Is it vital that they’re lively and have wholesome consuming habits or sure dietary restrictions?
The match assembly can also be a great alternative to get to know one another on a extra private degree and get a really feel for his or her character.
5. You will have a intestine feeling about them
Once you meet your potential IPs, it’s vital to belief your instincts. Lots of our surrogates say that after they met their IPs, it simply felt “proper.”
Perhaps your personalities simply clicked, otherwise you really feel actually drawn to their private story.
So, whilst you positively wish to ensure they verify the required containers for you (see the sooner factors), don’t underestimate the worth of a pure connection.
Study Extra About Changing into a Surrogate with Surrogate Parenting Companies
Surrogate Parenting Companies is proud to have a good time over 30 years of serving to to convey desires to life! Based in 1990, Surrogate Parenting Services (SPS) is a full-service surrogacy company that gives each events an exceptionally supportive surroundings all through the surrogacy relationship. We’re enthusiastic about creating supreme matches between surrogates and supposed dad and mom, so the journey is fulfilling for either side and the longer term youngster is introduced into this world in the very best circumstances.
Study extra about our Surrogacy Program on-line or by calling (949) 363-9525.